Jakarta Masih Punya Hutan

hai!
kali ini bakal nulis pakai bahasa, kapan ya terakhir kali nulis pake bahasa Indonesia? hehe
jadi hari ini tuh Idul Adha, siang siang diajak om survei tempat buat photoshoot pra-wedding yang bakal dipakai client-nya. dan ternyata tempatnya itu Hutan Bakau Suaka Marga Satwa Muara Angke. dan ini pertama kalinya saya kesana.
ketika sampai, ternyata kita kurang beruntung, tempatnya ditutup karena hari libur (Ied Adha), tapi kita dibolehin masuk hanya sampai depan pagar masuk.

jujur seneng sih diajakin ke tempat yang semuanya hijau.
dalam hati bersyukur di kota yang super crowded dimana setiap hari menghirup polusi ini masih ada hutan kecil yang masih dilindungi.
walaupun sedikit sedih ngeliat Muara yang dipenuhi sampah dari sungai sungai yang melewati Muara, setidaknya Jakarta Masih Punya Hutan ☺

Kapan ya Jakarta bisa hijau?

Toodles!

"The Break Ups"

hey. i just watched Glee "The Break Up"

yeah you know what i'm gonna talk about. i just suddenly have a mental breakdown because of it and i can't talk about it anywhere but here cause this is so personal and my blog is so personal for me, unlike twitter. not that twitter's not personal but this is more.

the episode is all about the break up. i knew it was gonna happen soon, just like what i have experienced. but after all tears i've wasted through watching this, i feel like i should put up some of the lines that REALLY related to me, my past, and my life.

S: "and i don't wanna be like all of those other long distance relationships that you hang in there for a few months and then break up when someone eventually cheats or things get weird"

B: "i never cheat on you"

S:  "i know. and i would never cheat on you either. let's just do the mature thing here okay? this is not an offical break up. let's just be honest that Long Distance Relationship are almost impossible to maintain because both people are really getting what they need. especially at our age"

B: "this sounds all like a break up to me."

S: "you know this is no working. you know i will always love you the most"

B: "i love you too."

 

   

  

F: "i'm trying to give you your freedom!"

R: "i don't need you to give me my freedom! i am a grown women, i don't need you to hide from me to keep me from doing what is right for me"

F: "oh like that brody guy?"

R: "i didn't do Brody. okay? and don't you think that i would've rather have been with you."

R: "don't you get it? no matter how rich or famous or successful i become, when it comes to you i'm always gonna be that moon eye girl who freaked you out at the first glee rehearsal. you were the first boy who made me feel loved, and sexy, and visible, you are my first love, and i want more than anything for you to be my last. But i can't do this anymore. at least not now. we're done." 

get it? it's just some of the lines that shot me. the songs? just as killing as those did.

but, just over it. 

i'm actually having a really good time in college lately. i gain so much friends and they're really really crazy, and did i mention it? i'm having a crush on someone :-) he's really good like.. in everything. he's so nice to me, haha not that i'm hoping for the next level tho, it's just i'm so enjoying this time i have with my new friends, maybe that's just one of those many things that makes me so happy right now :) 

 Toodles!

Promise and Others

helloo!!
i'm back in Jakarta now, facing this real life again :')

few days ago, i went to Bogor with my friends, bringing all the DKV freshmans for 3 days.
i gotta say, it was so so much fun for us :-D

 

 

actually i made this post to done my promise on my previous' post, i said i'd post my vacation video, right? haha i had my time so i uploaded it, here it is:

see? i had so much fun with my family, such a good time :-)

just few minutes ago(while i'm doing this post), i got my package from Coppelia Shop, and i love love it!

and by the way, One Direction released their newest video, Live While We're Young few hours ago, and.. I'M IN LOVE WITH THE VIDEO! like.. sjkdhjksglfliaskgfajigfiwuef i was fangirling over limits watching it! so i guess y'all should watch it too

Toodles!

feelings

hi!
i'm in Medan now, day 20 of Ramadhan. i went on Vacation before i got here, i went to Lombok, Bali, Bromo(Malang), Yogyakarta, Semarang, back to Jakarta and now here i am :)
but now i'm not gonna talk about it, actually i wanted to show you our vacation video instead of writing about it, which is more fun, but i don't know what's wrong with this internet connection here, i've been trying to upload it since maybe a week ago but always failed, yeah i'm too depressing about it but still trying :')

so now i'm gonna talk about stuff that i've refused to talk about here, stuff about 'feelings'.
so if you feel like it's just a waste of time reading this unimportant-thing-to-read, i'm telling you, you don't have to :)

you know i stopped talking about my personal life here since i'm not with somebody anymore.
it's like taking thousand healing pills and medications from my mental breakdown about 8 months ago. that's why i never talked about it again, i've been building something that had gone inside of me, haha sounds so stupid but i felt like i walked, talked, laughed, doing things without any feelings cause it crushed.

people say "The First One Is The Hardest". i get that.
i felt like a crazy lunatic. i cried everynight, i cut my hand so many times, well i think i shouldn't tell the details more hehe
i tried to find new things that i can do to keep my mind busy with positive things, i made a YouTube account, yaay! haha i wrote so many songs about him, cause i don't know how to spill out my feelings without causing blood or any bad things :/
the point is, i've tried so hard to get to this part, and it's not easy.

The problem is now, i'm here, in Medan, my house, and it's like every second is a rewind.
few days ago i met him for the first time since he left 11 months ago, kinda sad, isn't it?
and i've struggled with this feeling again and i can't help it.

it's not that i haven't moved on with my life, it's just i miss him. and the fact that every step i make here brings up the past memory, it's hard not to admit it.

mom once said to me:

"if you're meant to be together, you'll be together, no matter wherever you are"

i'm glad tho we're friends now :)

cheers!

here pics of me on my Summer Vacation at Gili Lombok <3>

 

 

anyway, i just made my instagram acc :|
so you can check.. if.. you're.. insterested. :|
 

click on the image

 Toodles!

17th

hi!
first i wanna say that i should be doing this weeks ago but my works were so crazy and i didn't have time for making a post, so this week kinda give me space to breathe cause all our works are done. (and i still think i should post about this)

so i wanna tell you about my 17th birthday :)
it's kinda dramatic actually, too much by turning 17 i think

(you can click on the pictures to view clearly)

April 26th 2012.
i was doing my ComGraph assignment, in my room, as usual, and it was around 1pm i got a message from mum said "where are you" then i replied, "i'm home" with no thoughts about anything happened after that. it's around 3pm and i heard my lil cousin screaming and running to my room, "mbaaak! bude dataaang!(hey! aunty's here!)" at first i thought what the hell is she talking about then i heard that, my mom's voice saying, "Assalamualaikum" next thing i know, i was running to my mom's shoulder, crying and telling my self that this is real. my mom is here, in Jakarta. a day before my birthday. she brought me a birthday cake and other things.

then it went fine untill at 8pm, i felt there's something wrong with my stomach. i thought.. ok, it's just my maag. but then i felt worse i couldn't even walk but i kept my mouth shut at that time. then mum went to sleep, but i'm still struggling with this and tried to do my CompGraph untill i couldn't even look at my screen and move my mouse. it was 11pm and i threw up. i thought after that it's gonna be fine, cause i had a mid exam the next morning.

April 27th 2012.
i tried to sleep but my phone starts buzzing at 00.00, people starts sending me a birthday message and i woke up and i couldn't sleep. i start throwing up again. mum saw me sitting in my bed and realized that something's wrong with me. she said happy birthday to me that time. i start throwing up again and i couldn't sleep. that night, i ignored all the sweet birthday tweets and tweeted: "First time being 17 and I can't stop throwing up, this is not good (⌣́_⌣̀) thank God I have mum" kinda sad actually. then mom comforted me and told me to sleep, i told her if i was fine in the morning i'm going to my mid exam. but what happened in the morning was, i threw up again, and this time, i saw something red, mom was like screaming saying it's blood but i lied, i said NO! it's blood tho, i just didn't want mom to really worried about it. i couldn't walk, so i missed my exam. then mom gave me her birthday present, and a present from my aunt in Medan, and my cousins gave me a present to from my uncle

 this one's from mum♥

 this one's from lil cousins, oh look how pathetic my sick-face was, i tried really hard to smile for my mom and covered up my pain inside.

 and this one's from uncle :D

i couldn't get up from bed that time

i went to a doctor but i didn't feel so good. daaays before, mom promised to ask me out to a Waterpark in Lippo Cikarang to gave me a "refreshing day" from my works, and she told me we're going tomorrow. so that means i had to feel really well that time(cause i couldn't even walk). so mum called my family doctor in Medan that night and he told her some medicine for me. 

April 28th 2012.
i felt better in the morning. we went to Waterboom Lippo Cikarang, and had so much fun my family.

after 2hours playing in the water, i started feeling not good, i just sat and listening to my iPod, then suddenly i heard some people singing "Happy Birthdaaaaay" then i looked away, i saw Desrifa, Ryan, Ari, Nabel, Lukman, Soraya, Dagna, and Raymond came, from nowhere, followed by my mom. i was SHOCKED. i mean, how could all my bestfriends be there??!! and i found out, my mom set all this thing up. it was such a very great surprise and really fun day, i even ignored my pain cause i had my bestfriends there with me :'D

 i don't know how to pay this off to my mom. she's just the best mom in the world.

April 29th 2012.
we went to PIM and mom bought me some stuffs that i need. but the best part of this day was… I FOUND UP ALL NIGHT ALBUM! 

i screamed inside the music store when i found it :| cause i've been searching in this city and all i heard was "sorry, sold out" :'D
i didn't want that day to end cause mom's going home the next day :(

April 30th 2012.
3pm. i woke up, i just had 2 hours sleeping. i saw mum getting ready cause she had a 5am flight. but my eyes were so sleepy and i slept, till suddenly mum whispered to me, "wake up, i wanna go now." and she starts kissing and hugging me, i woke up and cried. i just didn't want her to leave that fast and back to reality when she's gone.

May 1st 2012.
my daily routine started again. i went to my campus and met my friends, they all said happy birthday and it was pretty much a normal day.
and so the day after that cause we're so busy with the last exam, Typography.

May 3rd 2012.
this day went normal as usual. our class finished at 5pm. it was very dark and about to rain, so i decided to go home but then Gisel said she wanted to go home with me. then ok, she said she's waiting for dhila then we could go. but the day's getting darker and darker so i start being so annoying at her and said we should go by now but then i saw dhila come out from plasa Syahdan brought a cake with candles on. yes, they set me up :') and they said sorry the surprise was late cause we're so freaking busy those days, haha i was flattered tho :'D♥

this is from dhila

SO! that's my 'Turning 17th' story, i can say, it was the best and the worst birthday ever at the same time :') i had my mom, my bestfriends from some places with me, i had 3 unpredictable surprises, i was dying, it's just an unexplainable feeling ♥ :')

toodles!